Heartbreak
by phoebe9509
Summary: Haleys still alive, and Hotch picks her over Emily after they've gotten close


Hotch and Prentiss had been getting closer leading up to Foyet's attack. It started after New York and escalated from there. They had each other's back, he would pair them up in the field more frequently, and neither one complained. They realized that their feelings for each other were growing, but neither wanted to act on it. They were scared. They had both been hurt from previous relationships, and they didn't want to ruin what they already had together.

After Foyet attacked Hotch, Prentiss was by his side whenever he needed her. She picked him up for work regardless of the fact that he could drive, she just wanted to be near him, and make sure he was okay. It broke him apart when Jack was taken away from him. He turned to Prentiss for comfort. She gave it, and their relationship took another step forward. They crossed a line with each other that they couldn't take back. They enjoyed each other's company. They felt alive when they were together. They didn't let them being together affect the work that they both did. Prentiss overheard Rossi talking to Hotch on the plane about when they catch Foyet, what is he going to do about Haley and Jack? Would he take them back?

Then Hotch got his family back. Haley and Jack were safe, and Hotch was happier than she'd seen him in a long time. It broke Emily's heart to see Hotch walk away from her. She understood where he was coming from but it didn't make the pain hurt any less. He pushed her away after he got his family back. He paired her with Morgan or Reid, he rarely ever talked to her unless it was work related. She never let her feelings of hurt show on her face while around Hotch. One day JJ pulled her aside and confronted her.

"What's wrong?"

"What do you mean?"

"You have a look of sadness in your eyes lately, and I want to know why. What happened? Are you okay?"

"I'm fine JJ."

JJ let out a breath. "It's Hotch isn't it?"

"Huh?"

"The fact that he got back together with Haley. You two were getting closer, we all saw that, and now she's back in his life and you're on the sideline to listen and watch as he talks and goes back to her." Emily hung her head. "I'm so sorry Em. He doesn't deserve you. You did more for him than any of us did, and he's acting like you two aren't even friends anymore. I don't know what his deal is but consider yourself lucky, because you deserve better than that." She hugged her friend tight before heading back to her office.

Emily knew JJ was right, but it didn't take the pain that he was causing her away. It didn't make him talk to her like they were friends. It didn't make her love him or miss him any less. She walked back to her desk and saw him through his blinds on the phone laughing. She couldn't take it anymore, and she grabbed her things and went home for the day. At home, she broke down and cried. She wanted him so bad. What made Haley so special? She left him, she didn't want him anymore, and now that she found him, Haley suddenly wanted him back? She went to bed that night thinking of a plan to tell him how she felt.

She went into work early the next morning. She needed to talk to Hotch without anyone else around. She sighed when she saw that the light was on in his office and she slowly made her ways up the steps. She knocked but walked in before waiting for his answer.

"I need to talk to you."

"Prentiss, what are you doing here so early?"

"I need to talk to you."

Hotch looked down into the bullpen. He knew why she was here so early. She wanted to talk to him without witnesses. He let out a breath he didn't know he was holding and put down his pen.

"What do you need to talk to me about?"

"I think you know." Hotch prepared himself. "Why Hotch? Did you feel the need to break my heart?"

"Prentiss I never—"

"You never what? Meant to hurt me? Meant things to go as far as they did between us? Hotch I was there for you every step of the way, I helped you. And don't get me wrong I wanted to, but then things happened between us and things were good between us. I fell for you, and I fell hard, but the moment you got Haley back into your life, you just up and left me. Did you even care about what I thought about the situation? Did you care about hurting me? Where was Haley when New York happened? Where was she with your hearing? She gave up on you Hotch, she left. She didn't want you anymore. But the second that you can get her back, you take that chance and I understand that because of Jack, but she'll never love you like I love you. She'll never look at you like I look at you. She'll never fear for your life like I do. Hotch, I can give you 50 reasons why I should be the one you choose, but I doubt you'd listen to any of them. And now when I see you smiling when you're talking to her or happy when you come into work, my heart breaks even more, because I didn't even get a chance with you. She had hers and she gave it away, but I didn't. And to top all of this off you act like I don't even exist, like we aren't even friends. What is that Hotch? Seriously! What is that? Did I mean nothing to you at all?"

Hotch stood up. "Prentiss, you can't believe that. Of course you meant something to me. You still mean something to me. I never meant for you to think that you didn't. I appreciate everything that you've done for me. I will always be grateful. I never meant for my actions to hurt you. But—"

"Don't say but Hotch. Don't say but because nothing good can come after it."

"I understand where you're coming from. I feel the same way for you that you do for me. And I know that she left me, but I think that I can change things between us. I think it's best for Jack that we're back together. I still love you. That will never change. I look at Haley and see you. I think about what our life could have been together, but Prentiss I can't do this."

"You don't love me. And if you see me when you look at Haley, then why are you with her? Why aren't you with me? Best for Jack? What about what's best for you? Do you think that this relationship is going to work this time? Do you think she's going to understand everything now? Do you think you two are still going to be in the honeymoon faze forever and things aren't going to go back to the way they were the first time? I was here with you Hotch! I saw how destroyed you were. I saw how long it took for you to get over it. Do you really want to go through that again? Because I can't speak for the rest of the team, but I can't bare to see you like that again. It broke my heart the first time, and we weren't even close."

"Prentiss—"

"Can you stop calling me Prentiss please? After all that we've been through I think you should have enough respect for me to call me Emily. That is my name after all," she snapped. "Here's how things are going to work between us Hotch. We'll be civil to each other, that won't change; we have to work together after all. Don't pair us up on the field, at all. Don't look at me, don't talk to me. And if your eyes meet mine, pretend that you can't see through the smile I'm faking. And pretend like you can't tell my hearts breaking. I hope she makes you happy this time, but when she doesn't, and she breaks you all over again, and takes everything away from you AGAIN, don't come to me. I won't be there this time, because in the end, I deserve better than to wait for you when you clearly don't want me."

With that, she walked out of his office slamming the door behind her leaving him looking after her speechless.


End file.
